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November 29, 2011

Enjoy The Red Carpet Treatment




Wives, how many of us have had this experience. You know. Husband does/did something he had no business doing, or he didn't do what he was suppose to do. Knowing that he was wrong on all accounts, he now is begging forgiveness even if you put him in the doghouse (silent treatment, no hot meal or sex etc..). Something minuscule to extreme (ex: buying the wrong item, not answering his phone, lying, flirting, and/or cheating puts a lack of trust in that area of your marriage. If your husband has a conscience he will do everything in his power to win you over....again....lol. No husband want his wife pouting, slamming doors, venting to her family, and having a plain ole nasty attitude. He will (should) rectify this situation by what I call the "Red Carpet Treatment."

This RCT a bittersweet act when wives receive this attention. This is when he is extra nice, sweet, touchy, sensitive to your needs and the list goes on. It could be his way of saying, "I'm sorry for what I done/didn't do." This is our time to receive his display of apology but at the same time he needs to know that it was not ok of his actions or lack of. This is where communication is extremely important. Not only does he needs to understand but know what you meant/feel concerning the issue. Afterwards, he needs to know what would have been a better way of doing it. Also wives, listen if your husband has/feel a better way of you doing it. Even if you don't agree, just listen. Often times we wives assume the husband understands but really he may not and think he does. Let this not happen.

Red Carpet, VIP! Some wives may get jewelry, a fancy electronic, car, lol etc.. but for the average everyday hard working hubby it's more practical. Manicures, pedicures, money, massage at your favorite spa, hair appointment, wax appointment (ouch!), favorite restaurant/outing, shopping at your favorite store, doing house chores, new pair of shoes, and the list goes on. It's good to feel and be treated with love, attention, and pamperd. Especially when they are truthfully sorry and showing you affection as the day is long. Once the two of you have closure on the incident, let the past be the past. Remember, enjoy it! You deserve it.

Lady A Speaks!








November 17, 2011

Have Great Morning Sex


So how's the miracle drug work? Morning sex can strengthen your immune system for the day by enhancing your levels of IgA, an antibody that protects against infection. And climaxing releases chemicals that boost levels of estrogen, improving the tone and texture of your skin and hair. But like most truly spectacular things in life, morning sex can go really badly if you don't do it right (dragon breath, anyone)? So do it, and do it right with these rise-and-shine tips.

For most of the working world, the blaring of the alarm clock isn't a happy sound. So why not turn that rude awakening into an erotic opportunity with a roll in the 400-thread-count hay? After all, scientists say that people who start their days by having sex are all-around healthier and happier than those who don't.

"Having sex in the morning releases the feel-good chemical oxytocin, which makes couples feel loving and bonded all day long," says Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., author of Because It Feels Good. It makes you stronger and more beautiful too: Morning sex can strengthen your immune system for the day by enhancing your levels of IgA, an antibody that protects against infection. And climaxing releases chemicals that boost levels of estrogen, which improves the tone and texture of your skin and hair. Want to max out the morning love? Follow these tips:

Give Him a Sexy Wake-Up Call

Set your alarm to play soft music, and as soon as you're roused, quietly slip out of your pj's. Then try this trick: If he's lying on his back, place your hands on his thighs with your thumbs pointing toward his genitals, suggests acupuncturist Alexis Arvidson. Move your thumbs in a slow, firm circular motion, two inches in diameter. According to the ancient teachings of acupuncture, rubbing this thin-skinned area will get the blood flowing straight to his
nether regions. Well, isn't that convenient, since that's where you're headed next!




Author: Elise Neresian
Woman's Health Magizine

November 01, 2011

Having Too Many People in Your Hair



Sometimes we wives can get caught up sharing too much information about our job, families and personal issues. It's good to have friends that will help you and give you positive advice in your time of need. This issue is not venting, but who you are venting too. Some may think they have all the answers while they have a war zone in their backyard. Its best to have one or two "go to" friends in the time of need or support. This person should be trustworthy, good morals and not bitter. Also someone who is going to let you know if you are WRONG! Check your list of "go to" friends and make sure they are what you need, not want. It's best not to take advice from someone who is bitter. Normally they would poison your way of thinking and outlook. That wouldn't be a healthy outcome.
Try and stay away from people who have "diarrhea at the mouth." I'm sure they mean well but at the end of the day, you do not want your business on front street.
When something happens in your life, marriage, children, job, etc..try avoid telling your whole entourage. It gets tiring and time consuming by the time you are telling friend #4. Keep in mind you have to go back to these friends and give them a report or update them. No, you don't have it but it's courtesy to do so. They took the time to listen and give their advice so who wouldn't want to know the outcome.

If you are a private person and you like to keep everything to yourself. Just be careful in doing so. You still have to find an outlet. Make sure you are getting good advice from good sources.

It's best to have a physical outlet too wives. From excerising to spa dates, having a little bit of "me" time is necessary for the heart. It will help you to think better, have clearer thoughts upon the situation and you will be distressed.

Wives, do the best you can do. If something hasn't been working for you time after time then try another approach. Don't be afraid to ask for help, but not just anyone. That could also mean your closest friend. Keep in mind that some strangers can give the best advice.

Keep up the good work wives. Taking care of the household has it's own stress, but yet it's very rewarding.


Lady A

October 20, 2011

Enjoy His Company








Often times we wives have over a million things on the mind. From past, present, future. Things that occurred or didn't occurred in our life. Did we pick the right occupation? Regretting things, wanting things, did I marry the right guy, I want another baby, when are we going to move into a house, etc...
Funny, even during intimate time with your husband, you could be thinking of the laundry list of things that needs to be done.

This is the time to try and be more mentally involve with your spouse. Engage in new topics. Have conversations that are meaningful and fun. Just let your hair down and have fun with him.

Been married for 14 years and my husband and I have finally have a "thing" that we do. After we eat dinner and the children dismiss theirselves. My hubby puts on a pot of coffee and we sit and talk about any and everything. One time we were at the table for hours not realizing it! We laugh, give ideas, discuss our general wants/needs and whatever else is under the sun.

We started this "talk at the table" last year. We didn't plan it or try to make something of it, we just did it. The next night we did it again and next thing you know it became a good habit.
We actually looked forward to it. I actually LISTENED to him, lol. I also remembered why I fell in love with him. I started looking at him differently. I see his gifts more and more.

Have more happy conversations and pillow talks. Just as good as sex! Lol! Oh, one quick tip wives. Spice it up with a little flirting here in there in his company. Don't over do it or try too hard. Just be sweet and subtle. A simple eyebrow raised, blowing him a kiss, or winking your eye at him says a lot. Make him blush or feel like a king in your presence (after all, you are queen). Remember Golden Wife, you hold the key to his heart. Don't lose the key, use it often. The little things I mentioned will add richness to your marriage.



Lady A



PS
I miss you guys!!! Big hug to everyone, even if you are not a follower.
I'm getting better health wise. No flare ups, yeah!!! Wives & Husbands, you all should be seeing more posting now! Love you all!

April 18, 2011

Comments

I received all of the wonderful comments and I will hold true to my word to blog more and often.

It's just that I ran into a road block, speed bump, detour, scenic route in life. It's concerning my health and I just might start a blog on this autoimmune disease.


In the meantime Golden Wives, prayer for good Godly wisdom that concerns your marriage and your husband. Remember, every husband is different, what type husband do you have? That will be on of the topics I will later get into.

I love you beautiful ones and stay encourage on this journey of wifehood. Don't be so quick to throw in the towel. Work it out with the Lord. Yes, even if he does the unthinkable...
Patience is a gift of it's own.

Lady A

January 04, 2011

Commintment

"If you really love someone, you shouldn't have to work at it."

That's what High School Musical star Vanessa Hudgens told CosmoGIRL! for its August 2008 issue. This young celebrity was speaking out loud what millions of people privately think: Loving feelings should come naturally in a relationship, so if you have to work at it, something's wrong. But the truth is exactly the opposite: If you truly love someone, you will work hard for the relationship.

Rock or Sand

Jesus spoke of a house that was built on sand and shaken by storms, while another house was built on rock and remained unmoved. One of my greatest surprises as a relationship analyst is just how many of us build our marriages on the sand of feelings instead of the rock of commitment. But I've been encouraged to see that truly committed couples are able, with God's help, to thrive even through the inevitable storms.

Over a five-year period, a close friend sent me e-mails sharing about her struggles with her marriage. She went from daily messages that read, "I can't take this anymore!" to e-mails saying, "He is such a gift to me." What accounted for the change? Her determination.

As she now says, "A successful marriage has little to do with circumstances and a lot to do with determination — taking the word divorce out of your vocabulary and replacing it with commitment."

What is Commitment?

Commitment is a decision to have the abundant marriage God desires, regardless of circumstances or whether you think your spouse is doing his or her part. This includes:

  • Realizing that marriage is an unbreakable covenant before God. At weddings, Atlanta minister Barry Grecu explains that ancient Hebrew culture understood a covenant not as a contract, which could be broken, but as a binding, permanent agreement — just like the covenant God makes with us.
  • Choosing to "do it until you feel it." We often let our feelings guide our actions, but we are actually built for the opposite. Our Creator has designed us so that when we love another person with our actions, our feelings inevitably follow.
  • Focusing on the good in our spouse and the sin in ourselves — instead of the other way around. If you're dissatisfied with your marriage, try this challenge: For the next 30 days, don't say anything negative about your spouse — neither to him or her nor to someone else. Every day, find something you appreciate about your spouse, and verbalize it. This marital application of Philippians 4:8 (which instructs us to focus on whatever is praiseworthy) has the power to transform a marriage. When we examine and work to change ourselves, we often bring out the best in our spouse as well.
  • Engaging in Christian community, prayer and discipleship — especially when you don't want to. These three aspects of the Christian life help sustain every believer, but they are particularly essential for those going through a difficult season.
  • Relying on God to help you act selflessly toward your spouse. As Grecu puts it, "We are incapable of living out our covenant promises in our own human strength. Jesus says, 'Apart from Me you can do nothing' and calls us to engage with the Spirit of God being lived out through us."
By Shaunti Feldhahn