July 05, 2009

Know Why You Owe

Overspending is a symptom, not a cause. I would like to help you probe your own thoughts and examine your spending behavior to see if you can understand the real reasons your mailbox is full of bills and so many entries in your check ledger list checks to creditors. Here is the truth: your ability to handle money is often a reflection of your security and wholeness as a person. Sometimes women overspend in a fit of fury over a break-up with a boyfriend or even an argument with husband. Sometimes they purchase things they can't afford because they feel inferior to others or are trying to impress them. Sometimes a woman is so deeply wounded by traumas in her past that she tries to medicated her pain with the things that money can buy. Then again, we occasionally see a relatively whole, stable, secure woman who simply has a problem controlling her credit card.
I want to encourage you to gaze into yourself and think about why you are in debt. It may take a while to sort that out, but only when you understand that motivates your spending can you begin to reverse harmful patterns enforce lasting change. Once you understand yourself and your reasons for spending, determine what lifestyle you can afford and stick to it. Do not be swayed by other people's opinions or by feelings of low self-worth. Listen, lady, you will soon learn if you haven't already, that nothing you bring home in a shopping bag can heal the hurts inside. Maybe it will numb them for a very short time, but they begin to throb again. If you are in this situation, may I suggest that you read my book, Woman Thou Art Loosed. Count less women just like you have been immensely blessed, helped, and set free by its message.
TD Jakes

Lady A